It was so hard dropping Camilla off at Kindy this morning. She was adamant she didn't want to go. Right from when she woke up "no no no Kindy". But still. Life carries on, and one must do things one doesn't want to do. Important life lessons I think in the long run. But still. Today was the first day I wish I didn't have to say Haere Ra to her each morning after mat time. She cried and cried, and I walked away.
I wish I didn't. But still. I do want to. I want to get home and put Katie in bed and get some peace and quiet. I want to drink my whole cup of tea, run a few lines through some tulle with my sewing machine, gaze at my to do list and do something entirely different, get dishes done without any droppages or "thats sharp!" reminders.
And then 11.30 rolls around, pick up time. It was only a few hours, but I am glad for the chatter again.
Have I ever been so torn?